What is the definition of the perfect life on earth? No pain? no sadness? all fun and no sour and bitter moments? and everyone is for you? everything is your way and you have a great career?
Come to think of it, a life like that won't be perfect at all. i mean, if our life is really like that, we won't have much things to share with our friends and family. everything's so perfect and there's nothing to change, there's nothing more to strive for.... there wont be anything to improve relationships...as we know, hardships can break relationships, but, it can make relationships better too.
with such a 'perfect' life, and everyone is smiling at u, you wont really know what people are really thinking of you and who really cares for you. everything will become bland and boring after a while... there wont be anything for us to think about or worry about..uneventful...
you know, if i were given a chance to go back in time and change any moment i hate, i wouldn't change it at all. because i wouldnt be who i am today if i changed it. and i most probably wont meet the people i know today.. and one of them is a very very special person to me... in a way, God made my life perfect. and i really thank Him for that. :)
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Exams again... 0.o
time flies...and i mean, REALLY flies.... it feels like after i left high school, time sped up! remember when we used to sit at those boring old classrooms, bored...waitinf for time to pass...? that's no more now... for some reason time doesn't seem to be enough...maybe coz too much work...:p
oh well, anywayz...finals for my 2nd sem in college is next wednesday. not much time left to study. hehe...the end of 2nd sem also means that i'm only about 4.5 months away from 2nd year. and that'll pass very quickly... 2nd sem was hectic. there's no more cu-cu, thank God, but we had a total of 5 productions to make up.... 2 dramas, 1 radio ad, 1 TV interview program, and 1 radio breaking news.
sounds fun? of course it is! but as i said before, more fun means more work. hehehe...i'm officially declaring myself as a member of people with panda eyes. hey, pandas are cute anyway, and they're china's national treasure. hehe....
the only thing i'm frustrated about now is that CNY holidays is smack right in between my finals. i'll have holidays for CNY...but at the same time i'll have o study for the paper after CNY. then only sem break. haiz...whatever la. hahahahahahahaha...
oh well, anywayz...finals for my 2nd sem in college is next wednesday. not much time left to study. hehe...the end of 2nd sem also means that i'm only about 4.5 months away from 2nd year. and that'll pass very quickly... 2nd sem was hectic. there's no more cu-cu, thank God, but we had a total of 5 productions to make up.... 2 dramas, 1 radio ad, 1 TV interview program, and 1 radio breaking news.
sounds fun? of course it is! but as i said before, more fun means more work. hehehe...i'm officially declaring myself as a member of people with panda eyes. hey, pandas are cute anyway, and they're china's national treasure. hehe....
the only thing i'm frustrated about now is that CNY holidays is smack right in between my finals. i'll have holidays for CNY...but at the same time i'll have o study for the paper after CNY. then only sem break. haiz...whatever la. hahahahahahahaha...
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
The Stereotyped Mass Comm
Most people who's not in the mass comm field or yet to be in it tend to think that mass comm is all fun. all practical. before i went into mass comm, i had a friend who said she's thinking of studying mass comm because she didn't want to memorize and study so much. Mass comm is often linked to...well, being famous. it is sometimes looked down upon and considered a course for those who didn't do well in their secondary education.
Boy are these stereotypes wrong. WRONG WRONG WRONG. first of all, i'm quite annoyed by it. who are they to come and make comments about mass comm when they're not even fully emersed in it? haiz....
mass comm is challenging in reality. it is not for the faint hearted. it requires an amount of courage because we need to face people, and take a lot of criticisms. besides that, it isn't really easy to find a job as radio and tv stations only open for interviews when they have a slot. or look for you if you're really good or hire you for life during internship.
mass comm is practical in many ways. but most people fail to see the theory part. theories are just as important as they will be used in practical. but most students don't care about theories. some even leave because too many theories....and the more fun your job is, the more work it requires. for example, we did a musical drama for our assignment. and i tell you, it was fun but it was also......well, we were zombified. first was the brainstorming for ideas, then came the writing of script, editting, rehearsals, and coz it was a musical we had to choreograph dance moves, learn and practice them, get costumes, etc....and there was the storyboard too... @.@
and it's only the 2nd semester. it gets well....more and more throughtout the sems...
i'm not saying that mass comm is bad. no. in facct i'm really enjoying it and doing well. however, it's just not what people think it is. it requires hard work, smart work, efficiency, will and determination to keep going. it requires sacrifice of time and money. so, if anyone out there reads this, think about it. most importantly, follow your dreams and don't let any hindrances stop you....
Boy are these stereotypes wrong. WRONG WRONG WRONG. first of all, i'm quite annoyed by it. who are they to come and make comments about mass comm when they're not even fully emersed in it? haiz....
mass comm is challenging in reality. it is not for the faint hearted. it requires an amount of courage because we need to face people, and take a lot of criticisms. besides that, it isn't really easy to find a job as radio and tv stations only open for interviews when they have a slot. or look for you if you're really good or hire you for life during internship.
mass comm is practical in many ways. but most people fail to see the theory part. theories are just as important as they will be used in practical. but most students don't care about theories. some even leave because too many theories....and the more fun your job is, the more work it requires. for example, we did a musical drama for our assignment. and i tell you, it was fun but it was also......well, we were zombified. first was the brainstorming for ideas, then came the writing of script, editting, rehearsals, and coz it was a musical we had to choreograph dance moves, learn and practice them, get costumes, etc....and there was the storyboard too... @.@
and it's only the 2nd semester. it gets well....more and more throughtout the sems...
i'm not saying that mass comm is bad. no. in facct i'm really enjoying it and doing well. however, it's just not what people think it is. it requires hard work, smart work, efficiency, will and determination to keep going. it requires sacrifice of time and money. so, if anyone out there reads this, think about it. most importantly, follow your dreams and don't let any hindrances stop you....
Thursday, September 4, 2008
1st Finals at College-Exam Stress
EXAM.....mmm....yup...
God is good, been doing fairly well this sem. However, i still cant help feeling worried about finals. I guess it's a natural feeling. Been studying for my first paper the past few days... but today..well....my mind and body just....stopped... @_@ first, i felt exhausted, then came tummy aches, and now.... well...i cant seem to feel anything. sure, there's info going through my mind, but, my facial expressions just cant coordinate with what's going on in my mind.
Kind of reminds me what happened on the first day of SPM... i just....fell apart. i couldn't study anymore. just looking at the book made me nauseous... and honestly, i felt like strangling someone, or rather, anyone! it's like i suddenly gone crazy, even wanting to just jump off a building for fun. Such a commotion was there in me, i could hardly sit still during the exam. Good thing it was BM.... not any other hard subs.. when i got home, i just cried... cried for hours... i couldn't eat much, in fact i couldn't even study for the next paper... i couldn't do anything except cry... till i fell asleep.. good thing i felt better after that...but not really in a good way either. you see, when i've passed a certain point of stress, i just couldn't care less. I just couldn't care about my exam anymore, and i had to force myself to study. Good thing about it was i had no fear... it's like i was totally numb.
I'm not numb now...i'm not stressed to that extent yet... but..just feels like, i'm gonna shut down any moment.. maybe it's just psychological... yeah...
... ...
God is good, been doing fairly well this sem. However, i still cant help feeling worried about finals. I guess it's a natural feeling. Been studying for my first paper the past few days... but today..well....my mind and body just....stopped... @_@ first, i felt exhausted, then came tummy aches, and now.... well...i cant seem to feel anything. sure, there's info going through my mind, but, my facial expressions just cant coordinate with what's going on in my mind.
Kind of reminds me what happened on the first day of SPM... i just....fell apart. i couldn't study anymore. just looking at the book made me nauseous... and honestly, i felt like strangling someone, or rather, anyone! it's like i suddenly gone crazy, even wanting to just jump off a building for fun. Such a commotion was there in me, i could hardly sit still during the exam. Good thing it was BM.... not any other hard subs.. when i got home, i just cried... cried for hours... i couldn't eat much, in fact i couldn't even study for the next paper... i couldn't do anything except cry... till i fell asleep.. good thing i felt better after that...but not really in a good way either. you see, when i've passed a certain point of stress, i just couldn't care less. I just couldn't care about my exam anymore, and i had to force myself to study. Good thing about it was i had no fear... it's like i was totally numb.
I'm not numb now...i'm not stressed to that extent yet... but..just feels like, i'm gonna shut down any moment.. maybe it's just psychological... yeah...
... ...
Thursday, August 28, 2008
First Sem in College
Now that i've reached the end of my first sem at TARC, I can write a lot about it...that is...the events i can remember lar...hehe..
I am currently a broadcast student in TARC, setapak. God is good.On the very first day of orientation week, I got to know a girl. We freshies were told to gather at the college hall. Due to loneliness, I decided to befriend the girl sitting next to me. What a coincidence! Turns out she's also in my course, also in my tutorial group, and also lives near my place. Whoa... 0.0 so, we are now good friends...whenever people see me, they'll see her too... :) Let's call her Teng here...
All TARC students have to participate in Co-Curricular activities to get 2 credit hours so that we can graduate. Teng and i chose to go for contemporary dance. Much to our surprise, our assignment mate (let's call him Pin), also joined contemporary dance. Since then, we became the trios... hahahaha...glad to have both of them, they're nice people. and talented too! Pin and Teng took part in the cheerleading competition...I'm very proud to say that their team got 2nd place. Pin was the captain and choreographer. Sad to say, contemporary dance didnt go too well. Pin and i were in the same group... but we didn't win the competition lar... glad it's all over though...Teng's group got 2nd place :)
One day before contemporary dance competition, Teng and I packed our luggage and went to stay overnight at a friend's place at Wangsa Maju.. It was a LONG day...we only managed to reach our friend's apartment at night... we arrived in college early...but we had classes to attend and dancing to practice. So our friend (ML) brought our luggage back to her place first. After Teng's dancing practice, we went to KL Sg. Wang to buy clothes for the competition. The journey there was....horrible....bus air-cond spoiled and we had to change bus...and it took us about 2 hours just to get there due to traffic jam. We only spent 1 hour shopping...where I got my first formal dress... then we took another 2 more hours to get back to genting klang. By the time we got there,ML and her room mate had finished dinner (we supposed to have dinner together, but Teng and I arrived only at 9pm.....).. so Tebg and i ordered a separate dinner...steamboat actually...tomyam soup and porridge. It was quite nice la...
After co-curricular activities ended, we had plenty of break time in between classes. SO....we went out. First, we went to KL...specifically, Times Square and sg.wang....we went for a movie... the second time...was...yesterday....we went to jln ipoh...during the journey there, we had to change bus...that's when a horrible thing happened... both my friend's (Vanessa) and my SE K550i got stolen!!!!!!!!! :'( :'( :'( :'( at the same time, same place. Weird thing was, Vanessa and I were both wearing red, both wearing dark coloured jeans and sandals... oh....how mournful we were...and still are...our beloved K550i.....hers a limited edition model...and mine a totally brand new one under the age of a month... :'( GONE....:'( haiz....but in a way...feel sorry for those people who steal for a living... coz they'll eventually get into really big trouble.. and they have a totally wrong mentality and perspective towards life... our friends were very nice about it...what mattered was both of us are safe. But still...i guess it takes a while to recover from this shock and trauma.. though it is the 2nd time both of our handphones got stolen. coz...we really loved our K550i... :'(
Despite of all these...I'm glad to say that I'm happy in college.. I have good friends, good grades...what more can I ask for? well...except for my phone back and better bus services la...hehehe... :p But i believe everything will work out fine. :) Glad i chose this course too.
I am currently a broadcast student in TARC, setapak. God is good.On the very first day of orientation week, I got to know a girl. We freshies were told to gather at the college hall. Due to loneliness, I decided to befriend the girl sitting next to me. What a coincidence! Turns out she's also in my course, also in my tutorial group, and also lives near my place. Whoa... 0.0 so, we are now good friends...whenever people see me, they'll see her too... :) Let's call her Teng here...
All TARC students have to participate in Co-Curricular activities to get 2 credit hours so that we can graduate. Teng and i chose to go for contemporary dance. Much to our surprise, our assignment mate (let's call him Pin), also joined contemporary dance. Since then, we became the trios... hahahaha...glad to have both of them, they're nice people. and talented too! Pin and Teng took part in the cheerleading competition...I'm very proud to say that their team got 2nd place. Pin was the captain and choreographer. Sad to say, contemporary dance didnt go too well. Pin and i were in the same group... but we didn't win the competition lar... glad it's all over though...Teng's group got 2nd place :)
One day before contemporary dance competition, Teng and I packed our luggage and went to stay overnight at a friend's place at Wangsa Maju.. It was a LONG day...we only managed to reach our friend's apartment at night... we arrived in college early...but we had classes to attend and dancing to practice. So our friend (ML) brought our luggage back to her place first. After Teng's dancing practice, we went to KL Sg. Wang to buy clothes for the competition. The journey there was....horrible....bus air-cond spoiled and we had to change bus...and it took us about 2 hours just to get there due to traffic jam. We only spent 1 hour shopping...where I got my first formal dress... then we took another 2 more hours to get back to genting klang. By the time we got there,ML and her room mate had finished dinner (we supposed to have dinner together, but Teng and I arrived only at 9pm.....).. so Tebg and i ordered a separate dinner...steamboat actually...tomyam soup and porridge. It was quite nice la...
After co-curricular activities ended, we had plenty of break time in between classes. SO....we went out. First, we went to KL...specifically, Times Square and sg.wang....we went for a movie... the second time...was...yesterday....we went to jln ipoh...during the journey there, we had to change bus...that's when a horrible thing happened... both my friend's (Vanessa) and my SE K550i got stolen!!!!!!!!! :'( :'( :'( :'( at the same time, same place. Weird thing was, Vanessa and I were both wearing red, both wearing dark coloured jeans and sandals... oh....how mournful we were...and still are...our beloved K550i.....hers a limited edition model...and mine a totally brand new one under the age of a month... :'( GONE....:'( haiz....but in a way...feel sorry for those people who steal for a living... coz they'll eventually get into really big trouble.. and they have a totally wrong mentality and perspective towards life... our friends were very nice about it...what mattered was both of us are safe. But still...i guess it takes a while to recover from this shock and trauma.. though it is the 2nd time both of our handphones got stolen. coz...we really loved our K550i... :'(
Despite of all these...I'm glad to say that I'm happy in college.. I have good friends, good grades...what more can I ask for? well...except for my phone back and better bus services la...hehehe... :p But i believe everything will work out fine. :) Glad i chose this course too.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Driving
I HATE MANUAL CARS...... despise driving them...... they're so hard to drive...especially 10 year old kancils with a worn and torn handbrake and seat belt...... well...gotta admit another reason i dislike learning how to drive is because my instructor smokes. and he marah me for not putting signal light. but the truth is...how am i supposed to put signal when he tells me where to go only at the LAST SECOND!!!!!
i'm fine driving in the circuit.....but on the road....haiz..... panic....its either driving on highways or small alleys....in those kampung area.. where there are pot holes, small little bumps, and dogs running about...not to mension lorries....
HAIZ....i just wanna quickly finish this and get my license. i really hope they wont ask for rasuah. coz.... i'm not gonna give them any rasuah!!!!
driving.....i may not like it, but i'll have to get used to it. it's a must now. otherwise how am i gonna get to work and send my kids to school in the future? or emergency..... public transport arent's exactly....reliable....and taxis are expensive. so...gotta drive.
anyway, i really hope it'll all be over by end of this month or latest, next month...coz....course starting in 2 weeks. in the meantime, i'll try to take things easy....hehe! bye!
i'm fine driving in the circuit.....but on the road....haiz..... panic....its either driving on highways or small alleys....in those kampung area.. where there are pot holes, small little bumps, and dogs running about...not to mension lorries....
HAIZ....i just wanna quickly finish this and get my license. i really hope they wont ask for rasuah. coz.... i'm not gonna give them any rasuah!!!!
driving.....i may not like it, but i'll have to get used to it. it's a must now. otherwise how am i gonna get to work and send my kids to school in the future? or emergency..... public transport arent's exactly....reliable....and taxis are expensive. so...gotta drive.
anyway, i really hope it'll all be over by end of this month or latest, next month...coz....course starting in 2 weeks. in the meantime, i'll try to take things easy....hehe! bye!
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
3 Days of NS
18.03.08
Woke up at 6.30 am with a heavy heart. after making sure i've packed everything, i pushed off to kajang bus station. i didnt know what to feel....anxious? sad? excited? scared? honestly, i didnt want to think about how i felt.
After registering at the station, mom and i went 'bus hunting'. we walked all over the place looking for my bus, only to find it near the registration counter at the last minute. =_='' all of us waited in the bus for 1 hour before it pushed off....leaving worried and crying parents behind...
the journey to KLCC (Kem Latihan Cheneh Cemerlang), kemaman, terengganu was quite smooth. everyone in the bus got to know new friends, and the bus only became quiet when everyone was asleep.
Around 4 pm, we arrived at camp. it was a peaceful place, with monkeys, beautiful owls, birds and lots of insects. after another registration and surrender of handphones, we went to collect our camp uniforms: class clothes, soldier track suits, exercise clothes, 6 pairs of socks, shoe polish, boots, sport shoes and shiny black class shoes (pretty but amazingly painful), towel, belts, beret.....
The dorm was very dirty. the bedsheet and blanket looked like they have never been washed. the toilet wasnt so bad, but the floors were often flooded with water.
At night, we had briefing. and the teachers also counted each race and religion. tidur at 11.30pm.
19.03.08
Woke up at 4.30 am. i was awakened by the malays getting ready for their morning prayer. the whole day was spent on grouping and briefing. it isnt quite so true that there are 6 meals a day at camp. morning tea, afternoon tea and supper were just drinks. and they didnt taste good....it was a SLOW day.....with not much activities....however, everyone got to know more friends. and we bonded quite well.
During afternoon briefing, the teachers and 2 nurses called out those who had medical problems using our medical reports. some were given green tag and red tag. while the others were asked to go home. i was asked to go home...which meant exemption from NS. it IS true that God works in ways we cannot understand....
At night, we had roll call. a one hour roll call. we were all wearing that amazingly painful shoes, so all of us grew quite impatient. we stood in front of our dorms, feeding mosquitoes while listening to dorm rules and regulations. we slept at 12.30am.
20.03.08
Woke up at 5.30am. after morning gathering to mark attendance, we had breaksfast and headed back to dorm. it was holiday, so we all could do anything we want...but with one condition....that we dont leave our dorm compound. literally emprisonment.
Late morning, all christians were called to the office. we were told that we could go home for good friday and easter, provided that we had our own transport home. because i was exempted from NS, they told me to go home straight and never return. so, after calling my dad to pick me up from camp, i went home at 4 smth pm....with 2 months of free time ahead of me... :p
Note: hope this is enough for those who wanna know why i'm back....hehe...
Woke up at 6.30 am with a heavy heart. after making sure i've packed everything, i pushed off to kajang bus station. i didnt know what to feel....anxious? sad? excited? scared? honestly, i didnt want to think about how i felt.
After registering at the station, mom and i went 'bus hunting'. we walked all over the place looking for my bus, only to find it near the registration counter at the last minute. =_='' all of us waited in the bus for 1 hour before it pushed off....leaving worried and crying parents behind...
the journey to KLCC (Kem Latihan Cheneh Cemerlang), kemaman, terengganu was quite smooth. everyone in the bus got to know new friends, and the bus only became quiet when everyone was asleep.
Around 4 pm, we arrived at camp. it was a peaceful place, with monkeys, beautiful owls, birds and lots of insects. after another registration and surrender of handphones, we went to collect our camp uniforms: class clothes, soldier track suits, exercise clothes, 6 pairs of socks, shoe polish, boots, sport shoes and shiny black class shoes (pretty but amazingly painful), towel, belts, beret.....
The dorm was very dirty. the bedsheet and blanket looked like they have never been washed. the toilet wasnt so bad, but the floors were often flooded with water.
At night, we had briefing. and the teachers also counted each race and religion. tidur at 11.30pm.
19.03.08
Woke up at 4.30 am. i was awakened by the malays getting ready for their morning prayer. the whole day was spent on grouping and briefing. it isnt quite so true that there are 6 meals a day at camp. morning tea, afternoon tea and supper were just drinks. and they didnt taste good....it was a SLOW day.....with not much activities....however, everyone got to know more friends. and we bonded quite well.
During afternoon briefing, the teachers and 2 nurses called out those who had medical problems using our medical reports. some were given green tag and red tag. while the others were asked to go home. i was asked to go home...which meant exemption from NS. it IS true that God works in ways we cannot understand....
At night, we had roll call. a one hour roll call. we were all wearing that amazingly painful shoes, so all of us grew quite impatient. we stood in front of our dorms, feeding mosquitoes while listening to dorm rules and regulations. we slept at 12.30am.
20.03.08
Woke up at 5.30am. after morning gathering to mark attendance, we had breaksfast and headed back to dorm. it was holiday, so we all could do anything we want...but with one condition....that we dont leave our dorm compound. literally emprisonment.
Late morning, all christians were called to the office. we were told that we could go home for good friday and easter, provided that we had our own transport home. because i was exempted from NS, they told me to go home straight and never return. so, after calling my dad to pick me up from camp, i went home at 4 smth pm....with 2 months of free time ahead of me... :p
Note: hope this is enough for those who wanna know why i'm back....hehe...
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