1st Finals at College-Exam Stress

EXAM.....mmm....yup...

God is good, been doing fairly well this sem. However, i still cant help feeling worried about finals. I guess it's a natural feeling. Been studying for my first paper the past few days... but today..well....my mind and body just....stopped... @_@ first, i felt exhausted, then came tummy aches, and now.... well...i cant seem to feel anything. sure, there's info going through my mind, but, my facial expressions just cant coordinate with what's going on in my mind.

Kind of reminds me what happened on the first day of SPM... i just....fell apart. i couldn't study anymore. just looking at the book made me nauseous... and honestly, i felt like strangling someone, or rather, anyone! it's like i suddenly gone crazy, even wanting to just jump off a building for fun. Such a commotion was there in me, i could hardly sit still during the exam. Good thing it was BM.... not any other hard subs.. when i got home, i just cried... cried for hours... i couldn't eat much, in fact i couldn't even study for the next paper... i couldn't do anything except cry... till i fell asleep.. good thing i felt better after that...but not really in a good way either. you see, when i've passed a certain point of stress, i just couldn't care less. I just couldn't care about my exam anymore, and i had to force myself to study. Good thing about it was i had no fear... it's like i was totally numb.

I'm not numb now...i'm not stressed to that extent yet... but..just feels like, i'm gonna shut down any moment.. maybe it's just psychological... yeah...

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